Heart that is aching..

Why am I feeling this heartache?
When I know that I shouldn' t do that..

Most of the times..
I feel empty..
I feel like there is a big hole..
That still need to be fill..

With what? Oh heart..

Bila mana kau masih mencari..
Tapi masih belum kau temui..
Allah dah kata.. Allah dah janji..
Semua yang ada di atas muka bumi..
Tak kira baik, buruk, atau apa pun yg kau alami..
Semuanya sebahagian dari janji..
Janji yang kau buat sebelum kau berada di sini..
Berada di atas muka bumi..

Tapi kenapa kau perlu mengeluh..
Berkeluh-kesah atas segala yang Allah dah tetapkan untuk kau..
Redha lah wahai diri..
Redha.. Redha.. Redha..
Walau iman kau senipis kulit bawang..
Jangan kau lupa Rukun Iman yang ke enam..
InshaAllah akan datang rasa bahagia..
Pada hati yang kau rasa menderita..
tapi sebenarnya Allah cuma nak uji rasa..
rasa cinta pada Dia.. banyak mana..

Ya Rahmaan, Ya Rahiim..
Hold my heart.. make it strong..
Bless me here in life.. and hereafter..
Lead me.. Give me strength..
To live my life to the fullest..
With You in my life...




27/02/2018

When THE heart stops...

2.26 am

Again.. writing isn't my passion..
But tonight is an exception..

I put my hand on my chest...
My heart is beating..
If it stops.. have i prepare?

I am too greedy...
Greedy with what the world has prepare for me..
Greedy with things so called 'duniawi'..

I know it will be hurt..
I know i will be in indescribable pain..
I'm lying if i say i'm not scared..
I just can't imagine..
If I leave this body..
Where will I be..

May Allah bless us with His Mercy..
May Allah forgive us for all our wrongdoings..
May Allah grant us Jannah..

Oh Allah... I'm scared if my heart stops beating...

Goodbye 2017..

2017 is coming to an end..

Hello 2018..

There are so many things that remain unattended in my bucket list..

So many things that i wish i could do for myself..
but being a working mom.. plus 4 kids..
weekend parent..
there's nothing much that i could do for myself..

really? 

WRONG!!

I AM WRONG!!

Its not because i couldn't do it..
Its because i wouldn't do it..
I didn't make time for myself..

I am getting another year older..
And my body and mind doesn't get any healthier..

I wish this 2018 would bring some light..

I wish to improve on my health condition..
I wish to improve on my body condition..
I wish to improve on my mental condition..
I wish to improve on my spiritual journey..

May Allah ease my road to success..
May Allah have mercy on me..

Aamiin...

Rapuhnya Iman

Rapuhnya iman manusia..

baru di jentik.. mengelupur bagai di pukul..
baru di tegur.. menangis bagai dimaki hamun..

apa kita tiada iman?
apa kita tiada pegangan?

Allahu Akbar...
Sesungguhnya Kau Maha Memahami..
Sesungguhnya Kau Maha Mengetahui..
Sesungguhnya Kau Maha Mengampuni..

Allah jentik sebab Allah sayang..
Allah tegur juga sebab Allah sayang..

Tapi apa penerimaan kita?

Semoga kita sentiasa berada di bawah lindunganNya sentiasa...

Moga aku temu apa yang aku cari..